I'm great at the zealous part, not very careful sometimes, very decisive, not great at budgeting ANYthing and hate laziness... I'm like- half there...
I get easily excited about things, amped up, energized and full of potential. Until I am not anymore. Then it's like moving a donkey. I just don't budge. I really don't like this quality in me sometimes- but then I can see the positives too. I'm like a match. I can get fired up, light others up, become too hot to handle(annoying), then I loose interest and fizzle out.
The one thing that I never lost hope in was God, I had never before recent events lost my zealous heart for God. Then life happened- piles of manure on my head until I was buried alive. From marital and family problems, losing jobs, cancer, you name it and it happened- NOTHING went right for years. It was a dark, despairing time for our family.
At the time I was about to fizzle out and lose all hope of re-kindling my heart for God and I thought by all intents and purposes I was a spiritual "gonner" I look back to realize no one dropped me. Well, atleast not the REALLY important ones that will love me through everything. Certainly not the one who set me on fire in the first place.
Held despite your potential to hurt is a humbling place to be.
Love,
me
Crys, you have a great gift for getting other people excited about what you are excited about- this is something that not many people possess. And I have seen God use this in mighty, purposed ways....so keep getting excited! It draws many closer to the really important one:)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Deb:) It's easy to see yourself as faulty and it's nice to hear when what you think is a fault can still be used by an amazing God:)
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